People have always focused on the importance of conventional, job-specific skills. Right from school, we are taught to pay attention to the things our teachers tell us. We are told to pay attention to what we are taught at college and learn from those experiences. More often than not, we pass out of higher education institutes with excellent grades and commendable resumes to impress the employer.

The one thing that forms one of the most important parts of a person’s existence, is their interpersonal skills. These however are things that no school no teacher focuses on. Interpersonal skills are basically the skills used by people on a daily basis while communicating with people in their surroundings. It involves both individual interactions as well as group interactions. Studies have found that people possessing strong interpersonal skills have a much higher chance of being successful in their personal as well as professional lives.

The most common interpersonal skills are related to communication; listening, body language, holding a conversation, etc. Some other interpersonal skills fall within the category of emotional quotient. These skills are important for regulating your own behaviour and also picking up clues and managing other peoples’ emotions.

Unfortunately, interpersonal skills are something that not a lot of teaching institutes focus on. While institutes will give you theoretical knowledge on how to go about doing your job, they will rarely teach you about how to manage your emotions or how to handle a conflict of your interest with those of others at your workplace. To make matters worse, most institutes completely ignore the importance of interpersonal skills.

Interpersonal skills are important for a variety of reasons, helping you in professional, educational and even social aspects of your life. They help you to work properly in a team helping in communicating effectively with others, be it friends, family or co-workers. These are also good for interacting with clients and customers in an appropriate and professional manner.

Some common interpersonal skills are:

1. Communication skills: These include verbal and non-verbal communication skills which include what and how we say things along with cues from body language and tone of a person’s voice. Interpreting what people say by analyzing their verbal and non-verbal messages is a part of listening skills.
2. Being able to work in a team, by managing your formal and informal interactions.
3. Negotiating with people and working with them to persuade them towards a win-win situation for everybody is also an important part of interpersonal skills. Addressing conflicts to come to a profitable solution is a key to interpersonal skills.
4. Making proper decisions in a time-bound situation is also integral to interpersonal skills. Decision making and problem-solving are also core aspects.

Interpersonal skills are treated by most organizations are the fundamental requirement for success and leadership. It has been noticed that most leaders have a stronghold over interpersonal skills.

Developing interpersonal skills is not difficult. All that is required is a conscious effort and a certain amount of perseverance:

• To begin, one must analyze their own behaviour so as to understand what are the areas where the shortfall is and begin working there. It is pointless to work on things like this without knowing what your weaknesses are.
• The best way to improve your interpersonal skills is by working on your communication skills. One must understand that communication here does not mean having a grasp of vocabulary. Communication is inclusive of listening to what the other person is saying so that you are able to respond to what is expected. It is important to pay attention to your own body language as well while communicating with others. Wrong body language can have disastrous impacts, going so far as to make you seem hostile in a situation where you need to be friendly.
• Try to understand how other people perceive you. This is also important for establishing proper communication with the other person. If the other person sees you as a loud person, it can reflect on the way they hold a conversation with you. Holding a positive attitude towards people goes a long way in helping you interact with them, therefore improving your interpersonal skills. A positive attitude reflects well on people and makes them more likely to listen to you.
• Managing your own stress and remaining calm is also a very important interpersonal skill. Stress can cause a person to come off as aggressive or overly passionate. These are emotions that others don’t react well to. Therefore, one must work towards reducing susceptibility to stress.

Put in conscious efforts and practice your interpersonal skills and also observe the changes you see in your interactions with others. This will give you a clue of how much you have progressed and how you can make things better.